Saturday, January 09, 2016

We're still here!

I'm making a commitment to myself for 2016.  I'm going to get back to blogging.  I need to be able to come back and read about this time in our lives.

I'll be back soon with an update but here's the short version of where I've been all year:
-full-time mom
-full-time wife
-full-time homeschooler
-full-time college student
-full-time student midwife

If you add that all together, it's pretty clear that there are not enough hours in the day/week/month for anything.  I feel like I'm being split in 10 different directions.  I keep telling myself that it is only temporary.  We leave Georgia next year.  I should be graduating then too.

Right now we are in the middle of moving again.  We're just headed across town, but any move in a family of ten is a "big deal."

I'm sharing our Christmas photo above, complete with photoshopped "snow."  It was 80 degrees that day (in November) but we managed to capture seven smiles.  This is my proof that we're all here and doing okay.

I'll be back soon...if there's anyone still reading...

Friday, May 01, 2015


I still can't believe my baby girls are nine years old.  They're so sweet, sensitive, and girly.  We had fairy photos taken to celebrate their birthday and the photographer perfectly captured their personalities in this photo.

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Nine years ago today...

...that face Leila made when she was away from Sarah for the first time in her life.  It was only 14 minutes, and they've been inseparable ever since, but it was obviously traumatic for her. 

...that moment when I was laying in bed after pushing two babies out of my body and I still couldn't believe that there were two of them.  And that they were mine.

...that time when Jason realized he was Daddy to two sweet daughters. 

 ...that love that Matthew was feeling when he brought two of his most precious possessions as loving gifts (or peace offerings?) to his new little sisters.

...that moment when I looked at them for the hundredth time and marveled at the miracle of fresh, tiny babies.

...and especially that moment when I became a mother of twins.

Monday, April 06, 2015

Easter 2015

Little Number Eight turned seven months old last week and is just starting to get her first tooth.  I still think she makes the cutest Easter bunny with just a gummy grin.

Seven likes to steal the show.  Always.

There are only 4 weeks left in this semester and I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.  Of course I go on call again next month so I'm not sure how long I'll have to actually get caught up on the 214,873 things that remain on my "to do" list.  Today, I'm optimistic though!

Friday, March 13, 2015

Mutant Super Bug

No, I'm not going to talk about c. Diff again.

We have had the weirdest, nasty little bug going through our house for the last 3 weeks.  It started innocently enough.  Scratchy throats turned into runny noses.  Then the coughing started.  A deep, croupy-sounding cough made everyone miserable.  Then sudden vomiting, followed by fevers and bloodshot eyes.  Then some diarrhea for good measure.  We wrapped it up with the lingering productive cough.

Again I am reminded of how much fun it is to have young children when they all get sick.  There was so much barf and so few buckets.  The four youngest ones have not yet mastered the fine art of throwing up in a bucket.  There so many times that Jason and I trudged upstairs in the middle of the night as another one was stricken with the virus.  Jason finally had to miss 2 days of work to help me take care of everyone.  The twins each got sick within hours of each other but the singletons got sick on different days and it was a long illness.  It lasted about 2 weeks in each person.

At one point, my bed was full of sick, feverish, weak little people.  Poor kids.

We had a few close calls with Violet too.  She stopped breathing a few times because she just couldn't clear the mucus from her airway.  I don't think I've ever had a baby so young get so sick before.  She was drooling, lethargic, and completely out of it.  I just kept praying that she'd improve before bedtime because there was no way I would go to sleep with her in that condition.  Fortunately, she perked up a bit that evening and began opening her eyes and nursing again.  I still didn't sleep for 5 nights.

We're all on the mend now and I think we might finally leave the house for the first time in 3 weeks.  I am so grateful that one of Jason's coworkers dropped off dinner for us one night.  It had been days since I'd cooked because nobody was eating.  It was so nice to have a hot meal.

Hopefully this is our one big illness for the year.  Thank goodness for homeschooling because we would have just missed about a month of school.  #bigfamilyproblems

Monday, March 02, 2015

This motherhood thing isn't for the weak

As I sit here surrounded by sick children and piles of dirty dishes, I'm really somewhat surprised that anyone survives being the parent of young children with their sanity intact.

Although I love to see the beautiful instagram photos from moms with children that are always clean and cheerful, I'm not sure how much of that is reality and how much is just a glimpse into the finer moments in an otherwise normal life.  I know it sometimes makes me wonder what I'm doing wrong.

Before anyone starts calling me ungrateful, let me elaborate.  I think this blog post sums it up much better than I can right now.  But believe me, I am grateful.  I love this crazy life and my loud children.  I even love the military life... more often than not.  So before anyone starts telling me that I asked for this, please know that I am glad that I've been blessed to live this life.  But it sure doesn't make it any easier at 2 am when I'm up with a baby that is struggling to breathe or when I'm cleaning up barf instead of writing a research paper that I desperately need to finish.

This is tough.  The delicate balance between hanging onto that tiny piece of me that is not Mom is a real challenge.  The unrelenting guilt keeps me awake at night when I think that I should have spent more time doing xyz (fill in the blank, because I worry about it all, from reading to my toddler to snuggling my baby to listening to my tween boys talk about Minecraft).  Basically, I hope that I somehow manage to raise loving, considerate, happy people despite never living up to the impossible standards that exist, either real or imagined.

I think that motherhood can be so isolating sometimes.  When you have more than a few children, you don't get invited to playdates and nobody invites you over for dinner.  Babysitting would cost a small fortune, if you could even find someone crazy enough to want to babysit all of your children.  The military life can be isolating too.  You move frequently and don't have the support of family or old friends.  By the time you meet people that actually like you, it's probably time to move again.  Maybe the strained relationship I have with my extended family emphasizes the lack of support, but I can tell you that it makes parenting much more challenging.  There are few date nights or helpers to call on when you're sick in bed and there are no groceries in the pantry.

There are so many more things I want to say but sick kids are calling.  And laundry.  And homework.
Tell me I'm not alone in feel this way.  What do you moms do to get through those times when you are ready to throw in the towel?

Friday, February 13, 2015

Help for a friend

Things can change so quickly... it's so hard to appreciate every moment we're given in this life.  My heart is breaking for a friend and fellow multiple multiples mom.  My dear friend Briana lost her husband suddenly yesterday in a farming accident.  They have seven beautiful daughters, including two sets of twins.  She is a homeschooling mom as well.

It's always amazed me over the last 13 years how some of my best friendships have blossomed from online friendships.  I have been so blessed to meet so many incredible women all over this country because of online friendships.  I haven't yet had the chance to meet Briana "IRL" but I hope to do that someday.  I am still good friends with many of the moms I met back on the AOL message boards 13 years ago when I was pregnant for the first time and a total newbie at this mom thing.  Motherhood can feel so isolating sometimes and it has always been so comforting to be able to connect with other moms online and have support when I really was totally overwhelmed.

I met Briana several years ago through a small online group for moms with two sets of twins.  When I heard the news yesterday, I was heartbroken.  I don't think that anyone is ever prepared to lose a spouse.  I know I thought about it often when Jason was deployed and yet I still couldn't imagine what our life would be like if he never came home.  To wake up one morning and start your day just like any other and end it without your partner beside you... so suddenly... I just can't even begin to comprehend what that is like for my friend and her daughters.

A family friend set up a fundraising page for Briana and her daughters.  If you feel inclined, send a donation.  Say a prayer, send a positive thought, or light a candle for this family.

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